Update, College life

I've been using that expression a lot the past week, "College Life". I mean, I am back in college, so I guess it makes sense and is fair to use it.

In a sense, I feel like it's all overwhelming. Being back here on campus, seeing old friends, being in classes. It's a different lifestyle for sure. Going from the sunny beach in Florida living a simple, and relaxing life where the only problem was feeling like I somewhat lacked a purpose; to moving back to MA. Living back at home, enjoying all the time I got to spend with my family, and reconnecting with old friends. Now I'm back at school. 2011 was full of a lot of free time, and free choices. Now I'm being held more accountable for myself and my actions. I have work, classes, and lots of homework. As my best friend put it the other day, college means "The feeling of never being relaxed, because you always have more stuff to do. Even if you have everything done for tomorrow, you know in the back of your mind that you could be doing more stuff for something in the near future." It's an odd feeling. It can drive you or discourage you.

I have learned (or remembered depending on how you want to look at it) that it is important to remember what I have accomplished everyday, and to feel good about myself. I'm trying to make quality time with friends and good conversations more of a part of my life. The past couple of days, this has been going really well. I'm thankful for it. I hope this is always a part of my life. Last year I struggled a lot with the question, "Who am I?" I know that this (conversations and friends) is part of that answer.

I feel like this semester I am more determined to get my work done and to make sure I do good. I like this. My main focus is school, and I think it should be, seeing the amount of time, and effort I'm putting into it, and the amount of money my parents have given (even though money isn't as important).

I'm still not sure what the future holds for me. Maybe I'll start my own non-profit, maybe I won't. Maybe I'll be a counselor, maybe I'll do work with people in third-world countries. Maybe I'll do something I've never thought of, or maybe I'll even die tomorrow. We never know when we will leave this earth. I just watched videos with a friend reminding me of how important it is to say things now. To make sure you are doing things you want, and have told those people that you love, that you do love them. "Maybe we've told them we love them; but do you ever get tired of hearing it?".

If you're my friend, please know I love you. I'm thankful you are a part of my life. I forgive you for the times that I haven't been a great friend, and I hope you can forgive me too. If you aren't my friend, please know you are loved, and that you matter very much. And also, why the heck aren't we friends? Cause you're probably pretty cool. We should probably talk.

I hope you have a good night. I hope tomorrow rocks. I hope in the next month you get to watch both a sunrise and a sunset. I hope every hour you get to hear the words "I love you" and you get hugs just as much.

There's a tattoo on my back that says LOVE IS THE MOVEMENT.

Goodnight,
<3