I miss my best friend

And sometimes I wish the man that I considered a mentor and a friend lived closer than Florida. No I don't mean Jamie. I wish we could have more conversations. Sometimes I just want someone to tell me it's all going to be okay. Someone that I know and respect and care about. I know maybe that's unfair to ask, but it's true.
I'm going to try to be the person I want and do as good as I am in school. Maybe even better. I'm pretty sure I just failed a midterm in my Comedy class, but let's be honest. I don't give a fuck about it. I really don't. It's going towards a piece of paper that I don't need nor really have a whole lot of desire to get. I'm not getting a single thing out of the class and I don't like it. And maybe I would have an idea of how much money being put into school mattered if it was actually mine. Because guess what world? I'm a 21 year old undergraduate student, and I don't have a fucking clue how much $1,000 is. Forget $20,000. Or $80,000. But I'm spending money I don't have. This is what I think I want to do. Flat out, I want to change the social structure of things in America. I want to focus on emerging adults in America. I want to make America a better place, one that I'm more proud of. I want kids to learn and fully understand the decisions they are making, how they will effect the rest of their lives, and how much of a difference we can make. This generation is the one that needs to be changed. I can say more, but it'll be all things that I've said and it won't be in a positive loving way.
I read Leo last night, then woke up and lived a life not practicing too well what I'm learning. I'm trying to be a better person. I'm trying to be a better person. I smiled the first time I wrote that sentence, so I decided to write it a second. Smiling is a good thing. I simply don't want to waste time in my life, and I want to try to be the best person I can be. Those are two things I desire right now.

A few weeks from now, you will see a post that starts with me talking about how I finally got to surf again after months and months of waiting. I can wait to write those words, and more importantly I can't wait to live them.

The end of this blog, this feels like me. I want to do things and I want to care about people and I want to try. Just simply try. I have hope. These things are who I am and part of what make up the person I am. I'm learning to love myself a little more everyday. At least I hope so, and overall I'm on that path.

Good night. You matter. Very much. I'll keep saying it because we need to keep hearing it. We need to believe it too.

<3