I want to be part of the hopeful. But sometimes I feel hopeless. And even when I have so many doubts, and I'm so scared, and I'm so hurt; I'll listen to other's pain and tell them to keep fighting and that it'll get better. Maybe it's heroic, maybe it's stupid.
Bummed out about yesterday. But it's not just yesterday. It's a the little things that I ignore, that I push aside. I say will get better and just continue to be positive. And when something big, like yesterday occurs and really lets me down; I start to question everything. To think about it all. To look at all of the flaws. All the things I don't like about everyone. How fucked up this world is. With me, the glass isn't half full or half empty. It's either full, or there's nothing but a single drop left in the bottom.
My mind is different. I think differently.
Sometimes I'd rather just be on an island with people that want to focus on what life means, what pain is and how to get through it, and what is love. I'm not saying people from MOVE. Sure, some of them. But others too. I honestly could live without many others. I'd rather do that or die.
Maybe on most other days I'd say the world is a great place, people just need to love a little more and be a little less scared about being real.
Today I'm just saying fuck the world. FUCK THE WORLD!
FUCK YOU!
AND YOU!
and YOU!
and YOU!
and you get the point.
I'm not perfect, but at least I try to focus on making myself a better person. At least I make an effort to be the person I want to be. What can you say?
.......
?
Don't tell me to cheer up. Don't tell me it'll get better. Look in the mirror and make yourself a little less pathetic. Cause we all are.
"in this moment that we both ignore the truth, it's all over."
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1 comment:
it's okay to feel how you feel. I have those full glass/one drop left moments too.
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